546. share. User account menu. Log in sign up. Because they have a supreme ruler. hide.
"Barkeep, the pu pu platter special, please.". I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. Welcome to r/Funny, Reddit's largest humour depository. You’re hilarious!”. Ew, take me upvote and leave my stool alone. You can share your funny jokes in the comments. Set your wifi password to 2444666668888888. Why won’t the Republicans impeach Trump? Two police officers crash their car into a tree. They were also sacred in ancient Egypt (a scarab is just a fancier name for a dung beetle). Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help check her balance. The lady janitor in my building asked if I would hang out and smoke some weed with her. I asked my 10 brothers and sisters, but they don’t know either. When I told my family I was becoming a yoga instructor, they looked at me like I was a mat man. I’m reading a horror story in Braille. Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? Also, dung beetles use celestial navigation to move about. There is nothing better than a funny joke to make you laugh, so here is our ongoing collection of the funniest jokes. But when I got home they were still there. save. And I miss him! I decided to kill off a few characters in the book I'm writing. 95% Upvoted.
The beetle, called Onthophagus taurus, was found to be able to pull a whopping 1,141 times its own body weight, which is the equivalent of a 150-pound (70 kilogram) person lifting six full double-decker buses.Mar 23, 2010 copy paste from livescience.com.
I had a vasectomy because I didn’t want kids.
So when someone asks you what it is, you can tell them it’s 12345678.
546. HaHaHa! Why do we tell actors to “break a leg? My girlfriend is like the square root of -100. Sorry, this post has been removed by the moderators of r/funny. Why do North Koreans draw the straightest lines? Share the best GIFs now >>> So I pushed her over. I met a Jewish girl and she asked for my number.
How often should a person make a chemistry joke? What did our parents do to kill boredom before the internet? HaHaHa! What I would give for a solid stool like that... Fun facts, the dung beetle isn't just the strongest insect, but the strongest animal as it relates to strength to size. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. One of the coolest creatures out there. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. And yes we saw all the true big ones but these little guys really put a smile on our faces.
The sun god was depicted as a dung beetle rolling the sun across the sky. August 4, 2019. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away. What’s the toughest part of being a vegan? You can share your funny jokes in the comments. report. Sort: Relevant Newest # lol # laugh # laughing # hulu # hahaha lol # laugh # laughing # hulu # hahaha # funny # lol # laugh # laughing # haha With Tenor, maker of GIF Keyboard, add popular Hahaha Not Funny animated GIFs to your conversations.
She said “Because you are funny.” I said “I thought it was because I was good in bed.” She said “See? Statistics say that 1 out of 3 people in a relationship is unfaithful. Because they insist on carrying a baby to full term.
I just can’t deal with high maintenance women. I asked my wife why she married me. The dung beetle was super memorable for us. My wife and I honeymooned in Africa. My wife ran off with my best friend.... My girlfriend dressed up as a police officer and told me I was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed. I hate people who take drugs. It will definitely spice up my autobiography a little.
He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them. Moderators remove posts from feeds for a variety of reasons, including keeping communities safe, civil, and true to their purpose. I decided to kill off a few characters in the book I'm writing. She seemed surprised. If you have a great joke, please share it in the comments.
After 3 minutes all charges were dropped due to a lack of evidence.
Close.
Periodically. If I had a dollar for every time someone over 50 told me my generation sucks, I could afford a house in the economy they ruined. I got home to find my wife had left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn’t working I’m going to my mom’s”. I had to said no. Church.
Now I just need to figure out if it’s my wife or my girlfriend.
I asked my wife if I was the only one she has ever been with. Why is girlfriend one word but best friend is two words? There is nothing better than a funny joke to make you laugh, so here is our ongoing collection of the funniest jokes. Press J to jump to the feed. I opened up the fridge. Apparently keeping it to yourself. I told her we use names here.
Because every play needs a cast. I’m not sure what she was talking about. A solid 10, but also imaginary. Cookies help us deliver our Services.
My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. After months of grueling tests, a species of horned dung beetle takes the title for world's strongest insect. Welcome to r/Funny, Reddit's largest humour depository. Because your best friend gives you space when you need it. The light was on and the beer was cold. 14 comments. The DEA is the worst.
After a moment of silence, one of them says, “Wow, that’s got to be the fastest we ever got to the accident site.”. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. Posted by 2 hours ago. Something bad is about to happen… I can feel it. Press J to jump to the feed. 1 1. Would love your thoughts, please comment. What do you call a book club that’s been stuck on one book for years?
Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube. 1560 GIFs. Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight… There would be mass confusion. She said, “Yes, the others were at least sevens or eights”.